Little miss lube play menu
Little Miss Lube Play Menu
Starters
You might just gloss over this menu thinking you don’t need to use lube, but just because you or your partner might get “wet enough” for sex, doesn’t mean you should ignore the benefits of using a lubricant.
Lube is an accessory to help you get the most out of your sexual experience, whether it’s coupled or solo.
But Little Miss Lube has a stigma attached to her side that can be hard to shift. In the past, you might have been taught or heard that if you’re up for sex then you “shouldn’t” have a problem getting wet.
What a load of rubbish.
There are many reasons you might be turned on, up for sex and not be getting wet. Medications, menopause, hormone changes and just the way your body is made are some of the reasons vaginal dryness occurs. (Of course, sex should never be painful, so if vaginal dryness is causing you stress or pain, please see a doctor).
I’ve mentioned some reasons for your information but don’t think you need a reason or a justification or an excuse for using lube.
A good lube makes things wetter so there is less friction and reduces the risk of pain so you can have more fun. As with everything, I can’t choose the right lube for you but if you read through the rest of this menu, you will have enough information to go out into the lube world and purchase what you need.
The Main Meal
There are different types of lube and I will outline why you might and might not want to use each type.
Water-based lube
First up, water-based lube. It is definitely the most versatile because it can be used for anything and with condoms and toys. You also don’t get an icky stain. I
f you get thrush or bacterial vaginosis then just watch out for glycerine (not the 90s song by Bush) but the little nasty ingredient that’s potentially gonna irritate.
If you’re using a silicone toy then reach for the water-based lube.
Silicone-based lube
Silicone-based lubes have staying power. They last the longest, can hold up in water play, are hypoallergenic and are okay with latex condoms. Silicone lube is also good if you experience dryness.
A word on toys though. I’ve always found this odd but silicone sex toys and silicone-based lube are not a good match. If you’re using silicone toys then you have to go a water-based lube.
Oil-based lube
I tend to stay away from oil-based lubes. They are great for a back massage but oil-based lubes degrade condoms and can be irritating.
I like a delicious extra virgin olive oil in my salad dressing, not near my vulva. Still, if you want to go down the oil road, or perhaps you’re in the mood for play and the kitchen pantry is all you have at your disposal then you want to opt for a natural oil like coconut or avocado oil.
But even if you are grabbing a natural oil, you need to know that they won’t work well with condoms and they can irritate and cause infection.
I would always steer clear of synthetic oils (like Vaseline) for any lubricant that will be going near your genitals. You can use synthetics for massage but don’t slather a toy in Vaseline and then put it into your vagina!
Little Miss Lube says “no” to nasties
This is enough info for you to go and buy some lube. Look through the ingredient list before you buy and watch out for these ingredients that are known to cause irritation:
glycerin
nonoxynol-9
petroleum
propylene glycol
chlorhexidine gluconate
Remember, there is nothing shameful about using a lubricant. Whatever you can do to make the experience more comfortable and enjoyable is a positive thing. If you’re not used to using it then ease into it. Pop a towel down if you’re worried about it going onto the sheets, squeeze a bit onto your finger first and rub it between your fingers. You do need to apply it liberally and reapply but if you’re not used to using lube then take it slowly at first. Play around, see how it feels, and have fun. Little Miss Lube demands it!
Dessert
Aftercare
All our sexual play time should end in aftercare. Aftercare is a time for partners to wind down and feel secure and comfortable.
Our sexual experiences can bring up all kinds of emotions. We are human beings. Aftercare is a time to feel safety and closeness as if wrapped in an oversized, emotionally supportive jumper.
And there are some key ingredients to this post-coital closeness:
1) It’s intentional, so set aside time for it;
2) it’s vocal, which means you ask each other how you are feeling,
3) It needs to be discussed before play.
Other than that, it’s up to you what form it takes. It may be that you want to hug it out, dig into a bucket of ice cream, or put on your favourite tunes and have a lil’ dance party.
Aftercare is just as crucial for experiences with a new lover as it is for lovers who have seen the years together. And remember, it’s never too late to introduce it into your sexual experiences.
Love,
Theodora