The time that fart slipped out
I am still waiting for the end of a sex scene on Netflix/Binge/Stan/Prime to show that awkward moment where two people are having sex and one of them farts. I don’t know about you but awkward things happen all the time in my sex life! I kinda think it would be weird if they didn’t. Apparently, in a couple of decades, we’ll all be having more sex with robots than other humans but I like not being programmed to be perfect.
And I get it – a show has seconds or minutes to show a sex scene and make it hot and hopefully you have much longer but an acknowledgement of the “not-so-sexy” really does need a little more mainstream exposure. Sex as a performance has no place in the bedroom. Sex is messy, it’s awkward, it’s complicated, and at times it’s hilarious. It’s an experience, not a performance.
“I was blowing my bf and he couldn’t hold a (tiny) fart. We laughed til we cried.”
And the problem isn’t the awkward moments because they are going to happen. The awkward moments only become problematic based on how we react to them. Do we let these brief moments define the whole experience or do we brush them off? When we’re too busy wondering what our butt dimples look like or what our lover just thought of the fart that slipped out, we let our fears and worries take over. Quite simply, when we pay too much attention to the mishaps, we are not in the moment, we’re not connecting with ourselves, with our lover or with what’s happening right in front of us.
It can be incredibly hard to change our thought pattern and not hold on so tightly to these awkward moments but it always help to share them, have a laugh and know that you’re not alone. I’m revisiting some of the Instagram polls I ran a while back so you can see that many have experienced awkward situations.
Have you ever felt awkward about any of the following?
Have you ever felt awkward about any of the following?
As well as the results from the polls, some people also shared their awkward moment stories:
“The other night I was giving head, a bit drunk and very tired, so it was messier than usual. My partner said he thought it was hot when I gagged, so I played it up a bit and did it a few times. Then he was kneeling over my chest and came, but the gagging had made my gag reflex sensitive and as he came I vomited. I kept it contained and then was laying there trying to communicate and he was just staring at me, confused why I didn’t swallow, while I was gargling cum and vomit... it did not feel sexy at all, but we laughed about it after.”
“I was sleepy but sexting with a guy and I spelled ‘ass’ wrong and told him: ‘Cum on my eyes’.”
“The most awkward thing in the world is being really attracted to your partner and they have erectile disfunction. You try and try but nothing happens... you think it’s you and you feel ugly and unwanted but he just can’t do it. He doesn’t even volunteer to go down on you either... it’s a hard thing to live with when you love someone.”
“Flashback to the time I accidentally wrote ‘waste’ instead of ‘waist’.”
There’s so many opportunities for awkward moments to arise but let’s remember that sex, much like life, is a beautiful and messy mishmash of mishaps, amazements and surprises. Don’t dwell on the messy. Focus on enjoying the journey and everything that comes with it.
Love,
Theodora