Meet the artist / Yasmin Thornber
Evoke Erotes owner Yasmin Thornber
Yasmin Thornber scours for rare erotic treasures from the past for her antique shop, Evoke Erotes. I spoke to her about curation, 1930s condoms and society’s archaic ideas around what it means to be an empowered woman.
Yasmin, you own the erotic antique store Evoke Erotes. How did you come up with the name?
The concept of a provocative or erotic-based antique shop came way before the name and logo, which I spent so long creating! Originally I intended to call it “provoke” but as I was curating more and more stock and working on the aesthetic and photography, something about that name simply did not stick.
Provoke felt too angry. Evoke, however, was to recall or awaken a memory, a sensation, a feeling. Antiques have a wonderful way of evoking things in us, not only from the history they possess, but the stock and items I found would hopefully provide that sense on an even deeper level, something that makes you wince and salivate and gives you those chills of excitement and anticipation.
But “evoke” wasn’t enough, especially in the technical sense - single-word business names are challenging to work with, especially when it comes to having a level of consistency with an online presence; social media names and website domains needed to be all the same. And “evoke” unsurprisingly was very much taken. Evoke antiques seemed boring and not entirely explanatory.
I was sitting in my garden pondering for hours when it came to me. “Erotes” amusingly is often mispronounced as “er-ots”; “Erotes” (ero-tess) are the collective winged gods of love and sex—the entire spectrum of such: Antérōs was the god of requited love; Eros was the god of love and intercourse (also well known in the Roman counterpart as Cupid); Hedylogos, the god of sweet talk and flirtation; Hermaphroditus, the god of hermaphrodites, effeminacy and androgyny; Himeros, god of desire and unrequited love; Pothos, the god of yearning; and Phthonus, god of jealousy and envy.
That is what I wanted to evoke and the company name was born! The logo was a separate challenge of its own.
Wow, that is an amazing process; thank you for sharing! What made you want to venture into this space?
I was curating these items for myself for several years because I had such a fascination with antique goodies, which, as I grew older and more comfortable with sexual expression, bled together. I found it challenging to find these items and realised there was a Phallus shape gap in the market; I wanted to fill that hole. (I was also quickly running out of space to store all my goodies and trinkets and had to start letting go of a few prized items)
I work in the sex industry, run Evoke Erotes and am a freelance photographer and illustrator. I’ve always been passionate about educating the world that women are not defined by one thing. Women are often deemed a mum or a harlot, work-driven or sexy, a wife or a cougar. It’s demeaning and more so only a singular title. But women are an entire spectrum; we are all so many things at once.
I was frequently told I couldn’t illustrate children’s books whilst photographing my nude body and that I couldn’t or shouldn’t talk about my professional and personal sexual expression in previous professional fields, but that’s not for me. We all have sex, we all work, and we’re all someone to something, whether that’s a sister, a daughter, a mother or a partner; we’re also living, breathing, passionate, hard-working and sexual human beings. It’s important that people feel comfortable being themselves when interacting with me and my business.
This is so true! I have written many times about this idea that women are too often put into a box–you’re either a good girl or you’re a slut. I find people are shocked when they find out I have children and a closet full of my beautiful erotic treasures! On the topic of erotic treasures, where do you find yours?
Sourcing items has been a fun challenge - I can’t source things like most dealers because fairs don’t have the quantity of what I need, so I often attend fairs simply for socialising and networking.
I spend hours trawling through the depths of the internet to find goodies, and when I visit shops in person, there’s always one item hidden in the back room discovered by coaxing a dealer with open conversation.
I’ll say, “I’m looking for the rudest thing you own”, and their eyes light up and a finger beckons me to a back room where they’re modestly hidden, waiting to be discovered and bought.
I am also blessed with being accepted by the incredible antique and vintage community. I am often tagged or sent things from fellow dealers with a cheeky “I saw this cock and thought of you” or “It worries me that I saw this and had to send it your way”. I aim to have everyone in the industry think of me when they see something that excites them. It makes my job ten times easier.
How do you decide what pieces you’ll stock and what you’ll leave behind?
When it comes to curating, it’s all about being selective and following your gut instinct and style. In this industry your heart is rarely wrong–you get an almost ASMResque vibe when you see the right item.
If you love something that much and can imagine it in your home, odds are, in this massive world, at least one other person will, too. Alongside that, being sensible with money and understanding the profit margin is also incredibly vital.
What are some of the most interesting/confronting/outrageous/stunning items you have added to your collection?
Gosh, I’m sure the list will continue to grow and evolve! To me, everything is interesting but outrageous and stunning: a 1930s condom in its original packaging, an Ivory dildo that was over 100 years old, a wind-up brothel light, patinated restraints, shocking neon signs, the beautiful natural form of coco de mers, flagellants that would have been brutally used on others, now to be newly homed under consensual and informed hands. This is very important to me as we cannot forget that many items I offer were used under terrible circumstances, which should be acknowledged and those wrongdoings should never be repeated under those settings. But the list does go on. They’re all beautiful and outrageous in their own right.
What kind of role does an object’s story play? Do you find out much about the history of pieces? Do people want to know about the history?
Oh, absolutely people do! We all have such a fascination with stories. It’s almost perverse. I try to find out as much as possible about the item itself. This can be done with a bit of dedicated detective work ;) One must look for clues and hide oneself away to hunt and study. It’s one of my favourite parts of the job!
Occasionally I’ll be blessed to have more information from its previous owner and then the story can build even more. Why did someone own that item in the first place? Why was it even made? Where was it made, what conditions did the creator live and work under, where has that item travelled to during its lifetime and what have the lives of those who have held it been like? Was the material expensive for its time? Was it potentially a one-off, hand-crafted by a novice? An experienced professional? There are so many questions to explore. Heck, if you made something with thought, I think we’d all like to know that people cared just a little bit about that effort and the reasoning behind it.
So while it’s not always possible to answer those questions, I try my hardest to figure out as many as possible. It’s great small talk for when people visit your home and point out that purchase with: “Oh my gosh, what is this?!”
I see on your website that you’ve sold a lot of objects of play. Are people buying from you to use the items or are they for curiosity and display?
It’s been a wild journey and I’m so grateful that people have enjoyed and bought from this business. I’ll always state the condition of items to help people understand if it is an item that is safe to interact with or if it’s best used for decorative and collector purposes. Some of these items are incredibly old and must be appreciated and respected. You must understand the limits and boundaries of tools purchased from Evoke, not only for safety purposes but to make sure the item continues to live as long as possible. So, in short - BOTH!
Do you use any of the objects you find with your OnlyFans persona?
Only if it’s hygienic and safe to do so! There are several rules to comply with on that platform but I certainly do pose with them! I particularly love the tawse collection I had and the restraints. Certain clients adore the warm tones of my older stock incorporated with my rather fair complexion. I love that the two fields of business go hand in hand. It’s handy for funnelling clients.
I’m hellbent on elevating sexual expression. What does freedom of sexual expression and pleasure look like to you?
I think we’re going in the right direction –when it comes to freedom of sexual expression– don’t you think? But there’s still a long road ahead. To me, freedom involves a lack of censorship online and offline and a comfortable safety to present oneself, one’s art and creations to the world without judgement and without fear of being harmed or penalised. I do believe we’ll get there eventually. And I do believe we’re all screaming for that freedom.
If you could invite any five people to dinner (living or past), who would they be, what meal would you serve and where would you sit to eat?
Oh my gosh, what a fun question. I think about this a lot, don’t you?! I would want to host a dinner party with Derren Brown, David Attenborough, Dita Von Teese, Stevie Nicks and Brian Cox - imagine the conversations that could bring! It would be a picnic to cater for all food preferences and dietary requirements - fresh potato salad, Scotch eggs, cured meats and cheeses, fruits and sun-dried goodies based in rich oils. The entire meal would take place in a garden on a blanket, perhaps in the venue of Titchfield Abbey, a place of history and beauty (with a chair for Sir Attenborough to save his knees) and everyone could sit wherever they wanted, interact freely and pick and graze as the topics and entertainment flowed!
To see more of Yasmin’s provocative antiques, visit Evoke Erotes.
Have you seen Theodora’s erotic treasures? Shop some of them below.
